Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label thoughts. Show all posts

Meeting Emily in the Moors

#TheEmilyBronteTribute




I've come across many books that touches the darkest side of the human soul and the Gothic; still, my personal taste tells me nothing yet compares to Emily Brontë​'s one and only novel, Wuthering Heights--maybe because of Catherine and Heathcliff’s powerfully doomed characters or because of their eternal bond that surpasses this life and defies the next,  that I always find myself re-reading the book.



A Ranging Mind and a Loss for Words

I'm sorry, lately I have had lots of free time but never have I made a sensible good number of posts. The spaces and the repetitive rituals of the days seem to murmur sooooo many things. The windows are open and my thoughts simple just rush to and fro the sills leading me towards oblivion.

Seriously, I should entertain more positive thoughts and bright hopes but nature pulls me back to my pessimism. They taste so crunchy in my brain that I love to munch through the negative "what ifs and nots"

There was a time when worry did not use to kill me. But now, heavens knows how to stop them from getting overboard.

I'm at loss for words on trying to grasp the entire ordeal my mind wages day by day. I want to write about them but the specific word do not come. I want to take note of them but my hands are shaky and my thoughts have already reach a height were my hands cannot catch up.

It's a pity having to go through this again and again. Time and time again the cycle repeats........ "and the pattern never alters, until the rat dies.

Ch- Ch- Changes

It's high time for change, but change refuses to give itself freely to me. There are battles I have to win every now and then just to see me do something different. Perhaps, that's why many people dream of change and yet remain the same.



What is a promise to oneself: never to commit to an act that shouldn't be and yet fall off the chair, dwindling down to taste the sweet flavor of its temptation?

What is a resolve that gets defeated barely halfway to the battlefield?

What is a "YES" when just before leaving one entertains doubt? 


When Life Makes A Doormat Out of You

Pain, the more people try to talk you out of it the more it hurts. If at one point it seems you have just gotten through the elements of despair there goes another tease and it pulls you back where you once started. The thing is you will never be free until you’ve let yourself go and stop being that ‘doormat’ people keep stepping on. Your voice becomes unheard. You simply say yes. You cry in your bed at night hoping you would just die because the people around you wants you to just $#%*^@! OBEY. ( excuse my language but cursing helps relieve the anger.)

There is a time to be nice;  yes. But there are certain things one has to act consciously not to seem as if you are totally agreeing with one person. It’s a totally different story when one goes crying and immediately saying yes in surrender than one who gets to explain and fight for their side.

True. A guardian’s  or a master’s care wants you to keep of the tracks of danger. They do not want you to get wet in the rain but regardless life never thrown us here to just follow what others have done. Life threw us here so that we might discover how unique we are from one another. Until we understand that we never are going to get out of our shell. Some of us die inside never getting the chance to come out. 

You have to eventually get out that protective raincoat if you want to enjoy the rain and get sick as you may be but what the hell! Thing is you got to experience rain. 


So, stop being a doormat. Stop being that ‘obedient’ little kid people think you are. You’re an adult now so live up to what you think is best for you and self-discovery. It’s a scary path but once you make that first step out you’ll find your other foot will follow, leading you to place where you are supposed to be. 

Of Doodles and Hearts :P

fun art hand doodle <3
“While sitting on a rickety, old, bamboo couch I noticed it was nearing sunset. I told him (with a big smile),  "it's almost the golden hour." He just smiled and simply stared at the glistening sky towering above the rusty, old roof of the nearby boarding house and played with his pen (as he usually does).

Taking on the Backseat of Me :)


Maybe because most of my life people kept on placing me as/on pedelstals that right now I find myself relaxing in backseat of the worlds affairs...
  

Living in a Two Faced World: Character Review and Thoughts


Having an ugly, despicable, grotesque kind countenance speaks more truth than a damned, twisted soul dressed in beauty.... 

Those words basically sum up the entire aftermath feeling I go through once I've come to the last page of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by R.L.Stevenson. It reminds me so much of epic characters like Gollum/Smeagol, Dr. Frankenstein, Dorian Grey, and  Edgar Allan Poe's characters, etc. who lived double lives to shush up their considerably selfish, twisted souls. 



Most people call Hyde and Jekyll's case schizophrenia but I don't think anyone could sum up that experience to a mere biological disease. His shifts in countenance was more dug down deep towards his soul.